Saturday, July 27, 2013

How to be Successful in Cross Cultural Dating

A cross cultural relationship may sound interesting and cool but it is actually challenging and can become bumpy at times. Aside from the socio-economic backgrounds, where the two of you grew up; either in a small town or big city, your differences in culture really play a significant part in your relationship. Thus, cross cultural dating must be considered a time to narrow the cultural barriers. It should be regarded as something to learn all you can about the person you are dating who has a different culture from yours since the more you become familiar with your cultural differences the more you two will be able to understand each other and make your relationship grow strong and eventually stand the test of time.

Try as much as you can to narrow the cultural gap

Respect your differences

Indeed no two people are alike even twins as the saying goes and this is all the more true in a relationship between two different cultures. Finding a soulmate actually is not only limited to the same culture. It can even be more interesting when different cultures are involved. The key is not only to know your differences but also to respect the differences of your mate as well as those people around such as family and friends.

Determine how much they are into their culture

Always bear in mind that the loyalty of your mate to his culture has also shaped his personality and beliefs, thus by knowing this you can then be able to adjust. When talking about migration for example, you also have to consider that there is really a difference between someone who migrated here as a child or who migrated as an adult.

Learn the taboo words and actions

Different cultures have various taboo words and actions, so by making time and effort on your part to learn the taboo words and actions you will be saving yourself from getting into trouble. It is quite helpful so as not to be misinterpreted or regarded as rude.

Do your own research and observation pertaining to this matter or better yet ask your mate about it. He would be more than willing to teach you since this shows you are interested and he would be more pleased to know it.

Focus on the similarities

How can you find love and make it last forever is something that is based on how strong you and your mate focus on your similarities instead of your differences since by sharing your similarities you are both able to develop a special bond that will help avoid conflicts that may later arise as your relationship is progressing. By focusing on the things that you both have in common you will then be giving your relationship the opportunity to thrive more.

Cross cultural relationships are actually all right as long as you are willing to compromise and do your best to make it last just like in any other kind of relationship.

Lorii Abela is a Law of Attraction Practitioner and Finding True Love Coach for expatriates. She herself has manifested her match in 30 days through a process that she now teaches. Discover her secrets to finding true love by visiting http://www.manifestingmydestiny.com Lorii is available for coaching, speaking engagements and consultancy.

Friday, July 12, 2013

Dating Someone with No Common Interests

By: Lorii Abela

Dating has to be fun and worthwhile and this entirely depends on how you are getting along with the other person. Dating someone with no common interests can also be exciting that is if you are open to the possibility of dating someone who has interests that are quite different from yours. Having common interests is actually one of the keys to a fulfilling and lasting relationship; however, it requires time for you to be able to know if you have the same interests or not. One way to know is to date someone. Finding your match would not be that hard if you already have some guidelines.

Set a standard to gauge compatibility

Know what you want in finding a soulmate

Aside from saving you time, having a “wish list” is convenient and clear. Before dating, it is actually healthy to identify the core characteristics you wish your ideal mate to have. This should be considered as something important since from the outset you are able to identify and be sure of what you want. Without knowing this, you might settle for someone who is just available and wind up making choices you would regret later.

Do not accept someone who does not meet your “wish list”

Learn to say no if the core characteristics you have in your list are not present in this person who suddenly shows up in your life. If those interests you expect from an ideal mate are not typical of him, then most likely you have not found your match yet.

Give chance

If the person and you have something in common but not all of the characteristics in your wish list, do not say no right away especially if the things you do not have in common are not among your top non-negotiable. Law of attraction relationships usually start from this.

Never try to change a person

Do not insist on forcing and changing a person. No amount of intimidation will work. Changing a person is always a futile attempt unless that person is also willing to change but then again change is really up to the person. How much you understand the person and his characteristics is all that matters.

Some relationships are smooth. Is it because both actually love each other? But other relationships are rocky you can’t explain why. Is it because both have no common interests? Actually, both love and common interests are essential in every lasting relationship.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Dating South Korean Women

By: Lorii Abela

If you are open to having a cross cultural relationship specifically with Asian expats, why not consider the thought of dating South Korean women the next time you get the chance to meet one. How to find the girl for you is not something that you should worry as long as you are open to the possibility of even meeting someone of another race. Some may be picky and would only prefer someone coming from their own race, but then if you think about it even relationships of the same race at times do not turn out well. So, this only shows that love is all that matters regardless of age, race, culture, etc.

How to Make South Korean Women Fall for You

Remember They Put High Priority on Beauty

They are beauty conscious and especially like to lighten up their skin which explains why skin care products are in demand and its part of their daily routine. They do this as they believe that beauty can land them better opportunities including jobs. So include window shopping for cosmetics and buy the best brand for them while you are together dating or you can ask them their favorite skin care brand and give them one as a present the next time.

They Want to Be Treated Like a Lady

Be a gentleman. This is not a big deal if you are already one since this would be easy, but then if not and if you really want to win the heart of a South Korean women then try as much as possible to show them that you respect them and be gentle with them and do not fake it because they will know it. Do not be rude. They also want to be held, treated out and they expect you to carry their purse when you are dating them.

They Regard Education Highly

It is a plus if you have finished a higher degree as they value so much the importance of it. Basically, lawyers and doctors are on top of the list. Commonly, people with this level of educational attainment land a lucrative job. That is why they prefer them more than those with any other degrees for the future of their family as well that is if you end up marrying each other. They are very conscious about the status of their future and believe marrying people of these degrees would assure them of a stable and comfortable life.

They Respect Their Elderly

To gain the affection of someone of this culture, you have to learn and be aware that they value the opinion of their parents. This means you have to show respect for their parents as well and make it your goal to win their approval since this is very important especially if you are of a different culture as they usually have the tendency to prefer someone of the same culture for their children as influenced by their conservative culture.

Monday, May 27, 2013

Speed Dating for Expats

By: Lorii Abela

If you are an expat, it is but natural to want to make new friends since you would need a trusted guide who knows more about the place you are now living in. You can also be lonely at times, thus meeting new people in town is a good idea. There are now many different ways to actually make new friends and find your match such as the so-called speed dating. You only need to check out some speed dating events online. Go to the venue as scheduled and you can meet other singles for a chance to have a potential date or a friend.

Be Open to the Possibility of Meeting Well-meaning Persons Try Speed Dating

This is basically a way to see different types of people and be seen. Speaking of expats dating, this is a good idea to make good choices for a match since you get to meet many singles here in one setting. If you like the idea, this is quite interesting since you are given a time limit to get to talk to various types of personalities so you will have ample choices.

Do Not Limit Yourself to Meeting Only Those You Like

Also try to connect with people even though they are not your type. Anyway, your purpose is to have a good time. This will broaden your perspective and even help you make the best choices for a perfect match later. Who knows, you might think they are not your type but they have something good innate that your are looking for, so you’ll never know at first you think they can never be your match but then you just might have thought the opposite.

Try to Mention You are New Town

While in a conversation, try to let them know that you are new in town. You can’t be their type either, but they will probably empathize with your situation since most likely some of them were once new in town as well. The best part is you can gain information from them about how they managed at first and eventually reached the stage where they are now. You never know they can be your friend too.

Do Not Expect To Find Love at an Instant

Do not come with too much expectation however. Do not expect every person you meet to become your potential partner; you will only be disappointed this way. Be confident you will meet positive people but then also remember love will show up at the right time. You cannot force your love life to start right away.

Be Accommodating to Others

Help others find their potential partners as well by talking to them about speed dating since they might be there but have missed signing up or they came in late. This will give them an idea to participate. The more people get to join, the more fun it is!

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Dating Online: Tips for Handling Local Contacts

By: Lorii Abela

Most dating online tips center around security and safety measures on the first meeting. However, there are generally signs that the relationship may not be going in the right direction well before that happens. Don’t worry when that happens – finding a soulmate might just mean going through a heap of coal before you discover a diamond.

Dating Online: Tips for the Girl/Guy Next Door

Tip Number One: If they don’t want to meet, it might mean they’re hiding something, and that’s seldom a sign of a good start. Or it could mean that they’re not trustful enough of you. Or it might simply be that they have families, and therefore, weekend commitments. If a guy is reluctant to meet, that might well be the case.

The tip is: Watch for Signs of Reluctance to Meet

Tip Number Two: If you can’t see a photo of them on the internet (an actual one, mind you – not an avatar) then they’re either too cheap to spend $10 on a decent digital photo of themselves or – again – they may have something to hide.

The tip is: Make a Decent Photo Your Benchmark

Tip Number Three: Trust, but verify – Part of Lenin’s ideology but adapted by President Ronald Reagan during his term. It would serve well to make note of this. Prior to a first date, make sure you aren't caught unaware. Never let your contact pick you up if you can get there yourself; tell someone where you’ll be and for how long. Don’t dress provocatively; stay sober; and watch your drink! But despite these warnings, you must tune in to the right signs when you’re in the process of finding a soulmate: you can’t be too cautious and miss out on real possibilities. The law of attraction for love doesn't work well with suspicion as the basis of a relationship.

The tip is: Trust, but Verify

The third tip is probably the most important tip of all because it covers so many areas. You need to review their ‘stories’ to see if there are contradictions, perhaps take notes so you don’t get things mixed up; you want to check about kids, especially if they’re reluctant to accept a video call and you can clearly hear a “daddy” in the background – and don’t be fooled by the old “oh, I’m just their uncle” trick. Even Christian dating sites aren't free of people pretending to be something they’re not. The idea is not to scare you, but prepare you.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Soulmate Secret: Fundamentals of Being in Love

By: Lorii Abela

Perhaps at some point in your life you ponder upon the meaning of love. You might wonder why for some people it seems fairly easy to find love while for others the chance of finding a soulmateis quite nil. Are there some bases to follow like the so-called fundamentals of being in love? Well, some may say you are just lucky when you are successful at the thing called love. Although this is possible especially in fairytales, you definitely would like to review some keys on how to find your true love.

How to Find True Love?

Be in Love with Yourself

Yes, be in love with yourself! I am not saying that you turn into a narcissist person? Love actually starts from within and that means it should come from you first. Learn to appreciate yourself and accentuate the good points that you love about yourself. Do the things you love to do that are worthwhile and those that contribute to your self-improvement. In time these will reflect in the way you live your life and relate to others. You will be surprised it is then easier to find love with you bearing this kind of outlook.

Don’t Panic!

You think you are getting older and still single? You are absolutely not alone, so do not try to force love. Have you noticed that the more you force it the farther it slips away? It is because the law of attraction for love does not work this way. So do not be like the one who always thinks of ways or focuses on looking for a soulmate all the time. Mind you, when you are ready, naturally love will show up.

Love is not Always a Bed of Roses

It is quite impossible to never encounter any conflict in a relationship. This is actually part of it since the two of you are not exactly alike. You have different personalities, backgrounds, opinions, etc. So there is the possibility of getting hurt. To work things out both of you need to compromise. When problems arise cooperation is very important as well.

Define Your Expectations Clearly

The way you show your love to your partner may be very different from the way he expresses it. This is a fact that you should accept. Do not then expect to be loved the way you love since basically everyone has their own way of showing their love.

Happily Ever After

Not all love last for a lifetime. If you have to part, just acknowledge that your relationship in some period of time have clicked for a reason. Sure, you have done all the best that you could to keep that loving feeling and save your relationship. If it has to end, then it ends. Remind yourself then that true love lasts and if your relationship did not last as you had hoped for, then most probably it was not meant to be. You must have learned your lesson by now and continue to move on.

True love lasts so do not be discouraged since in time you will definitely find the one that’s written in the stars for you.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Attract Men by Being Mysterious

By: Lorii Abela

After a hard day’s work, you sit back and relax with a romance novel. You are just too tired to go out with friends on the weekends. You particularly do the same things everyday following your daily routine. You have noticed some of your friends are getting married or in several relationships, may be casual or long term. You can’t particularly do the same things for a long period of time or your life will be boring, so suddenly it occurs to you that you want some change and then you start telling yourself, “I want a boyfriend too.” Of course you can, but you have to definitely change the way you think and your lifestyle needs a bit of tweaking as well since you can never have a boyfriend by just relaxing with a romance novel after a hard day’s work. You need to go out on weekends and meet all those pleasant people you can meet. You might ask yourself how you will find a boyfriend. How to be attractive to men is not a difficult thing to do as long as you know some of the guideline to attract men. You can actually attract men by being mysterious.

How is it possible to attract men by being mysterious?

Most women think that attraction is totally based on attributes or physical appearance. Contrary to this, generally what most women do not know is that the ability to combine both the serious and the fun and doing it in a way that is unpredictable is what attracts a guy for the most part and makes him stay wanting for more. When you are unpredictably funny and sassy it is a plus point for attraction. When it is paired with something serious, it is a surefire complete attraction that creates some kind of mystery which will definitely make him stay with you. This simply makes you desirable and memorable since you keep him guessing what your next move is which practically signals that you are not boring to him. Also, if you can have a demeanor that is somewhat aloof which shows you can stand without him and you are not trying to impress him, this will give him the challenge to prove his worth to you.

How can you be mysterious to him?

Be unpredictable- do varied things. Have a bit of mystery and surprises since these will keep his interest.
Do not be available all the time. If you seem to be keeping tabs on him, he might think you are a stalker or pathetic. Give him the space he needs. When he makes a call, do not be there to answer right away just like you are waiting for him to call.
Have different plans occasionally. Occasionally, meet up with your girlfriends. Do not change your plans in his favor whenever he asks you out. Do not say “yes” right away all the time.
Do not tell him everything. Avoid telling him everything about yourself, particularly on the first date, or else there is no more left to find out about you.
Tackle on new topics when talking to each other. Avoid the mundane and usual topics such as his life, job, etc. that ordinarily what most people talk about. New topics are always good to keep the conversation interesting.

Enjoy the search and the goodluck! Use these tips to leverage on how to find the girl for you. You can get more information on how you can find love by visiting http://www.manifestingmydestiny.com Be sure to take advantage of the 6 Day Free E-mail Mini-Course.

Lorii Abela is a Law of Attraction Practitioner and Finding True Love Coach for expatriates. She herself has manifested her match in 30 days through a process that she now teaches. Discover her secrets to finding true love by visiting http://www.manifestingmydestiny.com Lorii is available for coaching, speaking engagements and consultancy.